Great Scott

There is a great, trippy scene in the third chapter of the Back to the Future trilogy, after Doc Brown finds the Delorean in its cavernous hiding place, where he himself had placed it some 70 years before (that’s the trippy part), the two time-travelers break it out, clean it up, and after a few new tires are placed on it, get it running again.  All the dust and decay of an extended hibernation couldn’t stop the ol’ tin can from taking Marty back in time to face his destiny.

That thinly veiled metaphor is what I hope will happen to my blog.  My life is in a rut.  I really don’t know what I’m doing or where I’m heading, but time doesn’t seem to want to slow down so I can get out a map and figure it all out.  Consequently, I really don’t have a focus for my writing.  I would like for there to be one, as aimless ramblings don’t really amount to much, and I’m not one for keeping a diary for the sake of keeping a diary.  I don’t even know if I believe I am important enough to have something to say.  One could make the argument that because I belong to the human race, that makes me important enough to have an opinion.  The other side of that argument is, of course, that stupid people tell themselves that in order to validate their lives.

I want to validate my life in a real way.  And so maybe that should be my blog’s focus: my efforts at validating myself, to myself.  My best friend once told me she didn’t know if I would ever allow myself a shot at happiness, at going after what I want.  I am where I am right now, and perhaps that is proof enough that she wasn’t being too overly dramatic when she said this. 

My record here is of my progress – narcissistic, vain, and likely futile though it may be - toward finding my balance, my acceptance, and my peace about myself.  Or whatever else I decide to write about.  Man, that’s almost existential.

Back to the Future.